Life Since Motherhood: What's Changed and What Hasn't

Happy Mother's Day to all those mamas out there! Are you doing anything special with your family? We had dinner at my mom's last night and today we are having brunch with my dad then heading out to our local garden center to get some plants and flowers so I can play in the dirt!

Teacup Human was born a little over a year and a half ago, sometimes it seems like yesterday and sometimes a lifetime ago. She is the absolute love of my life and I thank God every day that I get to be her mama.

Over the course of my pregnancy and new motherhood, I knew things were going to change but I also knew somethings were going to stay the same and get even better.

What's Changed

I don't give a fuck. After college, I wasn't much of a person who cared about strangers opinions - it was a long process to get there, but I got there. After Teacup was born, I stopped worrying about other peoples' opinions all together. My main concern is my baby and what she needed. Now granted, I give more weight to what my husband and family think, but that stranger in the grocery store? Fuck 'em.

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My tolerance for idiots. I've never had a high tolerance for morons, but when I'm functioning on little sleep and just want to be home so I can cuddle with my baby, that tolerance is almost gone. Nonexistent. There is murder in my eyes and I will let you know my feelings. I especially don't have tolerance for public places that don't have changing tables but do have highchairs. I don't care if it doesn't fit your esthetic. You know what's going to ruin your esthetic? Me changing my child's poopy diaper in the middle of the dining room. 

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Bodily functions don't gross me out. When Teacup was a week old, we took her newborn pictures. During this photo session, I got peeped and pooped on simultaneously. It was a nice "Welcome to Motherhood!" Since then, I've had my fair share of changing blowouts (it really can go all the way up their back), randomly getting poop on my hands, catching vomit, and being handed chewed food was deemed unacceptable. Plus, babies really do have the cutest farts.

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I am ten times more organized. I was always an organized person. In high school, I loved using my planner for writing down assignments, due dates, and the like. This trait followed me to college and beyond. For 2017 I had a regular paper planner which worked fine, but was lacking. For 2018 I upgraded to the Plum Paper ME planner and absolutely love it! I'll do a separate post on it later, but just know it's kind of the best thing and I would be lost without it.

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I'm more emotional than ever. I was always an easy crier, but now I cry at almost everything that brings upon strong emotion. Remember that Amazon commercial where the dad buys his dog a lion mane so his baby won't be afraid of him? Instant tears.

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What Hasn't Changed

I get to spend plenty of one-on-one time with my husband. It's not as much as before Teacup was born, but we still carve out time for just us. Whether that's watching TV after she's gone to bed, hanging out on the couch reading while she naps, or having a date night we ensure we keep our relationship strong. It's harder, yes, but it also allows us to enjoy our time together all the more.

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I am able to carve out time for me. Recently I've started doing Yoga with Adriene and I'm obsessed. It's definitely helped me be more claim and keep my racing thoughts at bay. It's helped me fall asleep quicker, and stay asleep, as well as be more present each day. I'm not toting this as "the cure for all your woes" this is just what has worked for me.

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Baby giggles are the best thing - and make it hard to discipline. If you tell me you don't at least smile when a baby giggles I'm going to call you a liar. It is one of my favorite things when Teacup giggles. The drawback is that when she does something bad and giggles when I scold her, I have to look away. I can't help but smile, which defeats the whole purpose, because "if Mommy is smiling and laughing I'm not doing something wrong." Joe is definitely better with disciple because he can keep a straight face.

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I care about my appearance. I'm not vain about it, but I also don't (purposefully) leave the house with unbrushed hair and dirty clothes. I've perfected the five-minute beauty routine - eyebrows, eyeliner if I'm feeling ambitious and have time, mascara, and lipstick. When I look good, I feel good.

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I drink alcohol. I'm not a lush about it, but after a long day and a cranky toddler a nice class of red wine goes a long way

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I have time for my friends. We're all quite busy and at this point are either married, having babies, or have had (multiple) babies, so I'll admit it's tricky to find time. But the nice thing is with today's technology, we're always within reach. We may have to schedule a night out months in advance, but it's always worth the wait!

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September TBR Pile Book Club: A Thousand Pieces of You by Claudia Gray

Hi guys! Welcome to the September TBR Pile Book Club where we'll discuss A Thousand Pieces of You by Claudia Gray! A huge thank you to everyone who will join us to discuss this AMAZING book!

Don't forget that everyone who takes part in our September TBR Pile Book Club is going to get 5 extra entries into the next TBR Pile Reading Challenge giveaway! If you haven't joined yet, head on over to our 2016 TBR Pile Reading Challenge Guidelines and Sign Ups to do so!

About the Book

A Thousand Pieces of You by Claudia Gray
Series: Firebird #1
Published: November 4, 2014 by Harper Teen
Genre: Young Adult, Science Fiction, Romance
Find it: Goodreads | Amazon | Barnes & Noble | IndieBound

Cloud Atlas meets Orphan Black in this epic dimension-bending trilogy by New York Times bestselling author Claudia Gray about a girl who must chase her father's killer through multiple dimensions.

Marguerite Caine's physicist parents are known for their groundbreaking achievements. Their most astonishing invention, called the Firebird, allows users to jump into multiple universes—and promises to revolutionize science forever. But then Marguerite's father is murdered, and the killer—her parent's handsome, enigmatic assistant Paul— escapes into another dimension before the law can touch him.

Marguerite refuses to let the man who destroyed her family go free. So she races after Paul through different universes, always leaping into another version of herself. But she also meets alternate versions of the people she knows—including Paul, whose life entangles with hers in increasingly familiar ways. Before long she begins to question Paul's guilt—as well as her own heart. And soon she discovers the truth behind her father's death is far more sinister than she expected.

A Thousand Pieces of You explores an amazingly intricate multi-universe where fate is unavoidable, the truth elusive, and love the greatest mystery of all.

"I meant it when I said I didn’t believe in love at first sight. It takes time to really, truly fall for someone. Yet I believe in a moment. A moment when you glimpse the truth within someone, and they glimpse the truth within you. In that moment, you don’t belong to yourself any longer, not completely. Part of you belongs to him; part of him belongs to you. After that, you can’t take it back, no matter how much you want to, no matter how hard you try."

Every form of art is another way of seeing the world. Another perspective, another window. And science –that’s the most spectacular window of all. You can see the entire universe from there.

"If not for yourself, my lady, stay alive for me."

Our eyes meet.

His next words are a whisper. "I have no need for a world without you in it."

This, I think, is the boundary line of adulthood. Not the crap they claim it is- graduating from high school or losing your virginity or getting your first apartment or whatever. You cross the boundary the first time you're changed forever. You cross it the first time you know you can never go back.

Apparently, when people travel between dimensions, their physical forms are "no longer observable," which is a quantum mechanics thing, and explaining it involves this whole story about a cat that's in a box and is simultaneously alive and dead until you open the box, and it gets seriously complicated. Never ask a physicist about that cat.

"If your mother had any idea we were talking about this, she'd skin me alive. I'm not being metaphorical about that. I think she could actually, literally skin me. She gets these wild eyes sometimes. There's Cossack blood in her; I'd bet anything."

"You are not my Marguerite. And yet—you are. This essential thing you share—your soul—that is what I love.” Paul’s smile is sadder and more beautiful than I have ever seen before. “I would love you in any shape, in any world, with any past. Never doubt that."

Discussion Questions

1) What was your favorite dimension that Marguerite visited? Which one would have most liked to travel to as her?

2) If you visited an alternate dimension, what do you think it would be like or what would you want it to be like?

3) While I'm not a fan of this love triangle, I think Claudia's approach to it was intriguing. How are your feelings toward the romance(s)?

4) Claudia treated us to two insane plot twists - one in chapter 24 and one in chapter 25. Did you see either of them coming or were you just as blindsided as I was?!

5) Will you continue the series?

Please leave your answers and any favorite quotes in the comment section below and don't forget to respond to other comments so we can have an amazing discussion! We'll be checking in and responding as well  :)

Keep in mind that if you haven't read A Thousand Pieces of You, we WILL be discussing spoilers. Avoid the comments if you don't want to be spoiled!

Additionally, do NOT post any spoilers regarding Ten Thousand Skies Above You or A Million Worlds with You (I don't think ARCs have gone out for this, but just to be safe). We read all the comments and not only will your comment be deleted in its entirely, but you'll spoil the books for us and that's a dick move.

The Reader by Traci Chee (Giveaway)

Hello lovely bookish friends! Today, I have the utmost pleasure of sharing with you an awesome giveaway sponsored by the wonderful Penguin Random House! We are celebrating the fast approaching publication of Traci Chee's THE READER, and giving one lucky winner a chance to win a copy of The Reader and a very cool I AM THE READER tote bag! 

But first, I'd love to talk to you about what books and reading means to me. Sefia’s clue to finding her lost family lies in a book. How did I find a family through books and/or through being a part of the online book community? 

I've always been a big reader - ever since I can remember! When I was a little kid, I always had my nose stuck in a book. I've read tons of adventure books -- stories about treasure hunts, mysterious places, tree houses, etc. When I got a bit older, I moved on to The Fear Street stories, X-Files novelizations and mangas. Then I discovered Stephen King, Dean Koontz, Graham Masterton, Philip K.Dick and Arthur C.C. Clarke, and so my literary tastes began to shape - to this day, I am still a huge horror and science fiction fan. 

But at that point in life, reading was a solitary experience for me. Sure, I occasionally talked about Dean Koontz' books with my closest friends, and yes, I was part of a manga club at school where  we would obsess over the latest releases, but I didn't feel like I was a part of any community, let alone had a bookish family. No, that came much later. It wasn't until I moved to Canada to be with my husband (at the time still fiance), and I started reading in English, that I began to seek out connections in the book world. 

My husband was studying full time, I was new to Canada and still very awkward in that transplanted-European kind of way. I didn't have any friends. I was alone at home for the majority of the time, and books became more than just ways of passing time for me. They became my lifeline. And it wasn't enough for me to just read them anymore, I wanted more - I wanted to talk about them with like-minded bookworms, share my excitement, fangirl and grieve together. I desperately needed to connect with the community. 

At first, I struggled with reading in English. It isn't my first language and I always felt the need to look up every word I didn't understand - and at that time, that was probably half of every book's content - and it would take me very long to get through my usual favorite's - Stephen King or Anne Rice. 

The year was 2008 and everyone was freaking out about the Twilight movie coming out, and so I decided to read the book. And that single decision turned out to be life-changing - a real pivoting point in my life. I read Twilight. I then read the rest of the series, followed by The Host and Chaos Walking Trilogy. And then I'd obsessively peruse my local library's YA section, looking for similar, amazing, exciting, captivating reads. And I was so into these books, I decided I needed an outlet, some place to talk about my feelings and thoughts! That's when Bookish Lifestyle was born (then still just Bookish), and where my first awkward and embarrassingly short reviews were posted. 

It wasn't all sunshine and rainbows from the start, trust me. For a very long time, I felt like I was just talking to myself. No one was reading my posts, no one was commenting on them, no one in the whole world was listening. Until one day, I came across a sort of forum for bookworms, where people would share their sites and connect with other readers and even authors (gasp!). To my utter disbelief, I was asked to review some books, and even provided review copies (my very first review copies, people!). I met Rhiannon Paille, Stacy Juba, Hank Quense and many other authors who trusted me with their stories. I did my first interviews, I posted first guest posts and hosted first giveaways. And you know what? My little blog started getting some attention...

Looking back at those times, I can't help but tear up. One single decision to pick up a book and then start a blog, changed my life so much, it's kind of unbelievable. Those first years in Canada were very hard for me. I don't think I ever admitted that to anyone - not even my closest friends and family - but those were some incredibly hard and lonely years, and I was feeling lost and out of place and so very unimportant. And I couldn't even complain, because I brought it all on myself - I made the decision to leave my home country to be with someone I loved. I had to live with the consequences. 

I don't think I need to tell you just how amazing the book community is - if you're part of it, you already know that. I met some of my best friends here. Over the years, I interacted with hundreds of fellow readers and bloggers, I exchanged tweets, DMs, emails, even letters and gifts. Some of these people became my lifelines - my blog partner Andrea (who is absolutely irreplaceable), my lovely co-bloggers Debbie and Jess, my Irish bestie Amanda, the always beautiful and caring  Amber... All of my beautiful bookstagram friends (Lisa, Becca, Korrina, Alix & Kelly, Rheney, Andie, Andrea, Allison, Alison, Crystal, and like a hundred other wonderful gals and boys), who are always there to chat with me, who offer words of encouragement and support, who never fail to lift me up and make even the darkest of my days so much brighter. All of these people are like my family. No, not "like". They ARE my family. Without them, I wouldn't be here. And I don't mean to sound overly dramatic, I mean it. I've faced some of the most difficult, painful moments this year and it's been an ongoing struggle the past months. Many times I felt like I was drowning, like I was ready to give up. I felt doubts. I felt heartbreak. I was in a very dark and hopeless place. And these people, my bookish family, they gave me hope, a reason to go on and keep on fighting. They were there to say "don't give up" when I really needed to hear that. They always are. When I get sick, when I am having a bad day, when something horrible happens, they are there. They hold my hand through it all. When something exciting happens, when I have good news to share - they're always there, too. They say "congrats!" and "good job!" and "I'm happy for you, you deserve it!" and they turn good days into absolutely wonderful days. It means so much to me. It is everything. My motivation, my hope, my reason to keep getting up after every single fall. 

To me, the book community is my life. And that's not an exaggeration or a figure of speech, it's plain and simple truth. I don't know where I'd be, or who I'd be, or even if I still would BE, without it. Without you. Without all of you and every single one of you. I read to feel better, I review to feel accomplished, I design bookish merch to stay alive, I post on Instagram to stay connected to my friends and extended family. My whole life revolves around books, and I absolutely love it. I wouldn't have it any other way. 

Thank you for being part of my life. Please know, that I appreciate you - probably more than you know. 

Giveaway:

In celebration of reading, I've partnered up with the awesome folks at Penguin Random House to bring you this exciting giveaway~

One (1) winner receives:
  a copy of The Reader
 a branded “I Am The Reader” tote bag

Giveaway open to US addresses only.

Prizing and samples provided by Penguin Random House.

a Rafflecopter giveaway

About the Reader:

Book 1 in Sea of Ink and Gold series
By Traci Chee
Release: September 13, 2016

A stunning debut set in a world where reading is unheard-of, perfect for fans of Inkheart and Shadow and Bone.

Sefia knows what it means to survive. After her father is brutally murdered, she flees into the wilderness with her aunt Nin, who teaches her to hunt, track, and steal. But when Nin is kidnapped, leaving Sefia completely alone, none of her survival skills can help her discover where Nin’s been taken, or if she’s even alive. The only clue to both her aunt’s disappearance and her father’s murder is the odd rectangular object her father left behind, an object she comes to realize is a book—a marvelous item unheard of in her otherwise illiterate society. With the help of this book, and the aid of a mysterious stranger with dark secrets of his own, Sefia sets out to rescue her aunt and find out what really happened the day her father was killed—and punish the people responsible.

With overlapping stories of swashbuckling pirates and merciless assassins, The Reader is a brilliantly told adventure from an extraordinary new talent.

About the author:

Traci Chee is an author of speculative fiction for teens. An all-around word geek, she loves book arts and art books, poetry and paper crafts, though she also dabbles at piano playing, egg painting, and hosting potluck game nights for family and friends. She studied literature and creative writing at UC Santa Cruz and earned a master of arts degree from San Francisco State University. Traci grew up in a small town with more cows than people, and now feels most at home in the mountains, scaling switchbacks and happening upon hidden highland lakes. She lives in California with her fast-fast dog. The Reader is her YA debut.

LEARN MORE

Visit PenguinTeen.com

Read an excerpt of the first two chapters here!

Follow @TraciChee on Twitter

#TheReader

A Babymoon in Chicago

As I mentioned in my "I'm Back" post, I'm currently pregnant with our first child! Now that I'm not constantly affected with nausea and wanting to throw up and the mere mention of food, my husband and I decided we wanted a quick getaway.

Originally, we had planned to take a London/Paris vacation this summer, but once we realized I was pregnant, the idea of a 14-some hour flight and walking around London and Paris for a few days (not to mention the price tag), just didn't seem like the best idea. Plus, I wouldn't get to eat all the food and drink all the wine I wanted. Luckily, the only thing lost was the hours I had spent planning said trip.

Once we made the decision to no longer travel to Europe this summer, our planning stalled. We knew we wanted to go somewhere, but where? Joe was thinking a cabin somewhere - but they he made me watch Hush on Netflix. I don't think he thought that through. Let's plan a weekend in a cabin right after watching a movie about a masked killer who shows up at a cabin in the woods and starts murdering people. No. Pass.

Two weekends ago we decided on Chicago. Neither us has had been there and it wasn't an awful drive from our house to the city. That Monday, after firmly deciding on Chicago, we looked at the calendar and realized between now and "too late," the only weekend we could go was that weekend.

After ensuring the stars aligned (Joe's parents could watch Bentley, getting time off work, hotel at a reasonable price, etc.) we booked our trip! Luckily, we knew a few people who used to live in Chicago and got a few tips on where to stay and what to do.

We dropped Bentley off Friday afternoon at Joe's parents and after feeling like an awful person as he watched us pull away from the window, we set off  for our long weekend getaway!

Babymoon Pros

• It's the "last time" you and your significant other will get to vacation on your own. Don't get me wrong, we are thrilled to become parents, but aren't delusional to all that comes with it. Chicago is filled with vacationing families and we weren't spared the sight of tantrums and maneuvering strollers through the crowded streets.
• When you get tired and cranky due to walking around in the high 80-degree heat, your husband doesn't mind heading back to the hotel so you can shower and nap. Any other point in my life this would have granted me an eye roll. Of course, any other point in my life this wouldn't have been a big deal.
• If you go to a place (like Chicago) with great shopping you can buy your little one a few

  

  www.disneystore.com

  goodies. Our hotel was right on the Magnificent Mile so as well as wandering and doing some shopping, we stopped at the Disney Store and may or may not have bought an outfit for our daughter's one year birthday. Look, I love Disney and I couldn't pass it up! They had the cutest baby section and I could have easily bought one of every outfit they had for sale. Note: When grabbing this picture from DisneyStore.com, I saw that they have matching shoes! Why didn't I see those in the store?!
• Going to the crowded jazz club on Saturday night ensures you get a seat at the bar. A good friend of ours told us we had to go to Green Mill Cocktail Lounge, a former speakeasy that Al Capone owned. By the time we got the lounge it was packed, but while waiting for our drinks (mine was a water, calm yourselves), a man seated at the bar offered me his seat so I didn't have to stand.
• If you time it right, while on your Babymoon, you can also celebrate your seventh anniversary. I didn't realize this until making dinner reservations for Saturday night, but it happened to be the same day as our (dating) anniversary, so that made the day and trip a bit more special.

Babymoon Cons

• Depending on when you go during your pregnancy, you easily get tired. I'm in the middle of my second trimester, so I'm feeling pretty good. Not first trimester nausea and extreme tiredness, not third trimester exhaustion and "get this thing out of me." However, walking around Chicago in the heat makes one tired and cranky. We didn't get to do all we had wanted to do due to the heat and my pregnancy, but that just means we have to go back one day.  :)
• If you're a wine/beer/alcohol drinker, you can't indulge in a drink with dinner or after walking around in the heat. I'm not a huge drinker, but when we go out to dinner I like to have a glass of wine. Can't do that while pregnant, so I just stared wistfully at Joe's beers while drinking my water.
• Same goes for food. We went to Tanta for dinner one night and they have some intriguing things on the menu, but I couldn't partake in all of it because some food is off-limits. Same goes for the sushi at Shaw's.  :(

Overall

While you may not get to do everything you want, it's still a special vacation that you share with your significant other before becoming a family of three (or four if you count your furbaby). We had an amazing time in Chicago and I'm so glad that we got to go.

Have you ever gone on a Babymoon, where did you go, what did you do? Or is that something you'd want to do when the time comes?

I'm Back!

As some of you may or may not have noticed, while Bookish Lifestyle has not been quiet, I have been virtually MIA since March. This is due to a variety of reason, but two main factors:

Blogger Burnout

The struggle is real guys. I got to a point where it all felt so overwhelming. Reading, reviewing, posting, updating, lather, rinse, repeat. I got to a point where I just couldn't take it any more. I felt alone and lost.

Why was I bothering? We're people even reading my posts? Was I making any bit of difference?

I know this sounds like an existential crisis and overly dramatic for something that is supposed to be a hobby, but that's exactly what it felt like. If you're a blogger and have been blogging for sometime, maybe this is something you can relate to. If you don't blog and you've ever been burnt out on a hobby, I know you can relate.

That feeling when your hobby turns into anything but a hobby. It turns into a chore. Something you have to do. Something your force yourself to do. Like cleaning. God, do I hate cleaning. But it needs to be done because while I don't enjoy cleaning, I also don't enjoy living in filth.

So I took a step back. I started reading for me, I stopped reviewing, I stopped writing posts, and I stopped putting effort into something I had once loved.

Pregnancy

Many moons ago, back when I was a newbie and Bookish Lifestyle (then known solely as Bookish), Evie had a baby and disappeared. Babies change your life (no duh) and she just didn't have the time nor enjoy to devote to the blog.

Understandable and expected. What I didn't expect was to feel the same way when I got pregnant. That first trimester was murder. I wasn't eating and what I was eating I was throwing up. Not a pretty picture.

I didn't want to read, it was the furthermost thing from my mind. All I wanted was to lie on the couch and watch mind-numbing TV. And boy did I ever. My reading slowed down immensley and books I was excited to read (namely The Winners Kiss by Marie Rutkoski and A Court of Mist and Fury by Sarah J. Maas) sat on my kitchen table for weeks. This was a series ender and a sequel to by favorite book of 2015 and I just did. Not. Care.

It would take me weeks to read books and that was only when I practically forced myself. TV was just so much easier. I didn't have to think and I could just zone out and relax. Going to bed at 7:30/8:00 every night also did not help.

I kept telling myself that this is when I should be devouring books and taking care of that TBR pile. Once baby comes there will be so little time for reading that I'll long for the days when I could sit and read uninterrupted for hours.

I don't mean that in a "I long for the days when I didn't have a baby" way, but the "Remember when I had all that free time and squandered it on trashy reality TV?" way.

Today

Which brings me to today. I'm father along in my pregnancy and things have calmed down. I'm back to my old energy level (almost), the nausea is gone, and I've read many books in the recent weeks.

I'm feeling . . . almost normal.

I woke up the in the middle of the night a few days ago and realized how much I missed blogging and Bookish Lifestyle. I missed interacting with our readers, creating posts, reviewing books and products, and realized it was time to come back.

Not only did my time away rejuvenate me, but it also gave me perspective. While I never felt like I had to review every book that I read, I made it more of an obligation. Even books I read for fun/for me I felt had to be reviewed. So I'm stepping away from that.

I'm going to continue reading books for me, but once I finish then decide if I should write a review or not (books I receive for review will be the exception). I was never the person to take notes while reading (with the exception of noting some fun quotes), so it terms of reading for review it won't change anything.

I feel like this mindset is going to make things so much easier and more relaxed. I'm giving myself more of an option and more freedom when it comes to blogging.

I can't say I'll be posting as much as I was a few months ago, but I can promise you'll hear from me more than you have been. I'm taking it one day at a time and we'll see what happens!

How to start a successful Society6/RedBubble store and NOT piss off a whole lot of people.

This was going to be a a RANT.

I have been very frustrated with people who either have been stealing my designs and posting them in their own stores, or have been a bit too inspired by them to create something original. It's been a long couple of months for me, nothing's been going right, and between my computer getting fried, me losing a big chunk of my old design, someone hacking into both my Society6 store and RedBubble and deleting them, and the stressful big move to Santa Fe that is quickly approaching (June), I have been so stressed, I have been having panic attacks. My anxiety level is through the roof right now, and the last thing I want to be dealing with is people stealing and copying me (and not only me).

Because, really.. 

That being said, I decided not to out the person publicly. 

Most of you know who it is that is causing both me and my lovely friend Lauren from BookwormBoutique such huge grief right now. Those of you who don't.. well, I guess you really don't need to know. I see no point in naming names, it would be to relieve my own frustration right now, and while it could work, I just.. I am not that person, you know? No matter how much something hurts me, I choose to look past and try to really see the person behind it. Some people call it empathy, I call it being naive.

So, instead of a grief and disappointment fueled rant, I am going to write a post about what I think is awesome, what I think is OK, and what I think is unacceptable when it comes to designing bookish merchandise (and not only for stores like Society6).

Bookish merchandise has become very popular and trendy in the past one-two years, and that is amazing. I personally love all sorts of bookish stuff, from book-inspired candles, bookmarks, tees and other Society 6/RedBubble stuff, teas to jewelry and more. These things are just an amazing way of showing your love and support for a book/author, and I love incorporating different products in my bookstagram photos. Plus, it's important to me that I get to support small businesses this way. 

However, with so many new stores and businesses popping up like mushrooms after the rain, it is important to make a clear distinction between being inspired by someone to start and do your own thing, and copying someone else's hard work in hopes of becoming popular and successful yourself. In fact, this is the first question you should be asking yourself before you even start doing anything. Am I inspired by someone else's awesome work to create something myself, or am I just copying their stuff, slightly tweaking it here and there to make it look similar and yet different? The first thing is amazing, and anyone who ever inspired someone else to do something amazing will tell you that it's flattering and wonderful. It feels good. The second thing, on the other hand, feels horrible to the person who is being copied. It feels like someone is stealing your hard work. It feels like a violation. It just doesn't feel OKAY. And it isn't OKAY. It is never OKAY. 

I feel like with bookish merch like candles or bookmarks it is a bit easier to tell if someone is copying someone else. The whole copyright infringement issue gets a bit more complicated and blurred around the edges where digital designs are concerned, because we, professional designers, use the same resources. We shop at the same places for fonts and graphic resources. There is also a limited number of sayings and tag lines bookish people use, and it's not like any one of us can claim to own the rights to, say, #bookstagram, right? It's a widely used tagline on Instagram, after all. We all say "just read", "shhh.. I'm reading" etc. It's just OUR thing. 

HOWEVER, I believe it is important to create original artwork, even if you feel like you want to design a saying or tag line that someone else already designed. For example, if I have a design saying "just read" and it is designed in a floral wreath, please don't design your own "just read" in an almost identical font, in a floral wreath as well. I believe that is being a copy-cat, and it is certainly not creative on your part. 

I was inspired to create my own bookish store on Society6 by two people - one was Lauren from The Bookworm Boutique (she is awesome!) and the other person was a designer I bought a fox mug from (don't remember the name, sorry!), even before I found Lauren's store. I thought it would be amazing to be able to do something like this, especially since I was already a designer and I knew how to work with Adobe Illustrator and Photoshop. 

I really loved and admired Lauren's designs - I still do, every day! - but I made it a point not to do my own designs in similar "fashion". I made it a point not to use the same sayings she did, even though they were amazing and brilliant, and I envied her creativity. I didn't want to be a copy-cat myself. I wanted to do something new, creative, something other people will come to me for because I am the only one who has it. 

Even though some of what Lauren designed were common sayings like "I read past my bedtime", I didn't think it was acceptable for me to design the same or similar saying, because in my mind, this design was hers. 

I truly believe that people need to think twice about what they want to design and HOW they want to design it. There's more than just the copyright infringement aspect to it, there's also a moral aspect to it. It needs to feel good to design something. If you have any doubt about your design being too similar to something you saw and liked, don't do it. If you think something you're creating isn't 100% yours and could potentially hurt someone or get you in trouble, don't do it. If it doesn't feel 100% right, just don't do it. 

Copyright infringement is a serious thing. You don't want to be dealing with law suits and penalties, because from I heard, they can be seriously hefty. 

And when it comes to designing, it's not just about copying other designers, because let's face it, in most cases the worst that will happen is a slap on the wrist and your work being removed from the site you're on. (Unless you mess with some seriously BIG guys.)

But it's about having your designing resources PROPERLY LICENSED. It's extremely important to use your designing resources properly. There are many websites that offer FREE designing resources like fonts and graphics, and stock photos, and some of them specify that COMMERCIAL USE is OK with attribution. If that is the case, you're good, as long as you give credit. 

Things get tricky on Society 6 because the "description box" works as a tag box, and get's cut off from view after few lines. So technically, there is no place you can put the attribution, and therefore the use of those free images becomes illegal. And if you don't have a proper license to show to anyone who asks for it, you're in trouble.

On top of that, some free design resources website only offer FREE stuff for personal use, and not re-sale. I do have a yearly subscription to freepik.com and I occasionally download stuff from there, but my stuff is properly licensed. If you download stuff from sites like FREEPIK.COM for FREE, and then you use that stuff in your Society6/RedBubble/other similar site designs, you are doing something illegal. 

Make sure all of the stuff you use in your designs (the ones you sale, not the personal-use ones), is PROPERLY LICENSED. 

I have The Hungry Jpeg on speed-dial. Or, bookmarked, whatever. 

There are some really awesome sites out there that sell affordable and amazing graphic and font packages, either single themed or bundled up into monthly or bi-weekly packages. 

The resources you purchase there will always be available for you to download, even if you accidentally delete them from your computer. And of course, you can use them for commercial use. 

Here are my top three favorites sites I visit and shop at regularly:

1) The Hungry Jpeg

2) Creative Market

3) Design Cuts

And please remember, it is never OK to use images you found on Google or any other images that you have no rights to use (i.e. proper commercial license). Not knowing any better doesn't make it right. 

As all of you know, big chunk of my designs are book quotes designs. Sometimes I design quotes from classic books, like Pride and Prejudice or Jane Eyre.

and sometimes I design stuff from newly released, hot-off-the-press books, or just general favorites that are not yet oldies and goodies. 

And I know a lot of you are wondering what is OKAY to do, and what is ILLEGAL.

So let me clear it up for you a bit, or at last try do so.

Best to my knowledge:

IT IS OKAY TO:

- use quotes from books that are in the PUBLIC DOMAIN (you can look up which ones are easily on google). 

- use quotes with permission from the author, because as Jay Kristoff once explained, most publishers consider such graphics/merch a free publicity that helps support the authors.

 (oh the stuff you learn from passive-aggressive random questions people send into the universe, that are clearly not directed at anyone in particular, and yet... ^___-)

What I do, is I try to ALWAYS ask the permission from the author before setting out to make a design. Because it's safer that way, and because those quotes don't belong to me and I consider this common courtesy. On top of that, I also feel obliged to offer free products to the authors, if I design something with their quotes. Again, I think it's common courtesy and the bare minimum I can do to show my appreciation of them allowing me to use their quotes. Authors have been extremely supportive of my designs and I feel super blessed to be able to do what I do! 

I don't want to be stressing over people copying my designs any more than you want be stressing over "accidentally" plagiarising someone. It's nothing pleasant do deal with, whether you're on one end of the spectrum or another. So I guess what I am trying to encourage with my today's post is ORIGINALITY. It matters more than you know.