I Am America And So Can You by Stephen Colbert (Review by Jason)

Genre:	Humor, Non-Fiction, Culture, Politics
Publication.Date	October 20th 2009
Pages:	240
Published By:	Grand Central Publishing |
Website	Stephen Colbert |
	I Am America (And So Can You!) - Goodreads
My review copy:	A copy of the book received from the publisher in exchange for an honest review

Where to get:

I AM AMERICA (AND SO CAN YOU!) is Stephen Colbert's attempt to wedge his brain between hardback covers. In plain conversational language, not to mention the occasional grunt and/or whistle, Stephen explains his take on the most pressing concerns of our culture: Faith, Family, Politics...Hygiene.

(Goodreads)

“Agnostics are just atheists without balls.”

“Tomorrow you're all going to wake up in a brave new world, a world where the Constitution gets trampled by an army of terrorist clones, created in a stem-cell research lab run by homosexual doctors who sterilize their instruments over burning American flags. Where tax-and-spend Democrats take all your hard-earned money and use it to buy electric cars for National Public Radio, and teach evolution to illegal immigrants. Oh, and everybody's high!

“Here's an easy way to figure out if you're in a cult:If you're wondering whether you're in a cult, the answer is yes.” 

Review by Jason

     Caveat Emptor. 

     Soon we might see health warning labels on soda cans, but do you know what’s a much bigger threat to your health than sugar drinks? It’s Stephen Colbert’s I am America (and so can you). 

     This book is morbidly viral, and the side effects of reading it include but not limited to uncontrollable laughing fits, mass hysteria, and psychological dependence. 

     Some studies showed that laughter is good for your heart, but too much of anything is never good. This book can trigger a laughing fit that might perpetuate itself. I nearly succumbed to cardiac arrest laughing too hard, too long (true story). So, for those of us with a weak heart, if you get a funny feeling in your heart while reading this book, make sure to take a pause every so often to let the joke sink in slowly – call your doctor pronto if laughter lasts more than 4 hours. 

     The humor in this book is also highly contagious, and all it takes is one look, one glace. Then you are hooked and can’t stop. Some passages are just too precious not to share, so I either read it aloud in public or pass it back and forth with my wife – I might have violated the rule number 8 on how to read this book: NEVER LOAN OUT. 

     Also note that the laughter does come at a price: addiction to Mr. Colbert’s humor. One may experience difficulties retiring from this book or fighting the urges to re-read it obsessively. Try putting this book down, the withdrawal symptoms kicks in: sudden loss of low self-esteem and cynicism (everything else that used to make you laugh all of the sudden tranquilizes you). After regurgitating every sentence of this book to your friends and families, no one will find the real you funny, unless you recite verbatim this book again. My wife doesn’t find my jokes funny anymore (true story). Once you go Colbertized, you can’t go back. 

     This book is kind of like Mao’s little red book with which people blended words in everything they say during cultural revolution. In fact, you might find yourself reading and carrying it at all time or even punctuating every sentence with a quote from I am America (and so can you) in situations like… 

     When you are with a date with acne problems: Mr. Colbert says “While skin and race are often synonymous, skin cleansing is good, race cleansing is bad." (Pg 173).

     When you are at a baseball game: Mr. Colbert says “Athletes perform for our enjoyment. So “performance-enhancing drugs” are really enjoyment-enhancing drugs.” (pg. 73). 

     You might quote Mr. Colbert’s for various reasons like to imply friendship with Mr. Colbert or impress your date. The possibilities are limitless. 

     This book is also full of life lessons applicable to dating, sports, higher education, Hollywood, race, science and many more. Hey, Stephen Colbert is one of the smartest people you see on TV these days. 

     What could possibly go wrong? 

     If you are hungry for more of Mr. Colbert’s witty humor or wishes that his night time shows are a little bit longer, you might find this book intriguing. It also might be tempting knowing that every reader of this book is awarded the Stephen T. Colbert award for the Literary Excellence. But be warned that this just might be the last book you’ll ever read.