Genre: Young Adult, Supernatural Publication.Date June 22nd 2011 Pages: 124 Published By: Decadent Publishing Company Website Rusty Fischer |
Ushers, Inc.- Goodreads My review copy: Review copy received from the author in exchange for an honest review. Where to get: Amazon |
When the streets are full of bloodsuckers, werewolves, zombies and ghouls, where will you turn? The cops don't know how to stop them, the Army's pretty much given up and even the Marines are stumped when their bullets and grenades fail to stop the onslaught.
Have no fear, Ushers, Inc. is here! Four high school movie ushers, who collectively have seen over 42,000 hours of B- and C-horror movies know just what to do.
Did you know copper pennies can stop a zombie in its tracks? Abby Cooper, Head Usher, does.
Did you know garlic paste is twice as effective on vampires as garlic cloves? Abby Cooper does.
Did you know werewolves are absolutely petrified of seeing a Hershey's kiss? Abby Cooper does.
The girls at Cypress Cove High school-especially Rich Witch Mia Hopwood-call Abby an uber-geek; the victims she rescues from zombies, werewolves and vampires just call her one thing: Hero!
But Abby and her fearless crew of movie ushers-slash-superheroes face more than just bloodsuckers and brain-biters. There's Wyatt Winters, for one; he's the hot new PR guru Ushers, Inc. has had to hire to handle all their press - and with his smoldering good looks and air of confidence, he's causing more than just tension between Abby and her old boy-crush-and fellow usher-Zach Nash.
And let's not forget the monsters, who aren't too happy about four geeky ushers beating their butts all over creation. Now the League of Associated Undead (LAD) is converging on Cypress Cove, determined to stop Ushers, Inc. once and for all.
When it's the monsters versus the monster hunters, who you gonna call?
Ushers, Inc., that's who!
(goodreads.com)Have no fear, Ushers, Inc. is here! Four high school movie ushers, who collectively have seen over 42,000 hours of B- and C-horror movies know just what to do.
Did you know copper pennies can stop a zombie in its tracks? Abby Cooper, Head Usher, does.
Did you know garlic paste is twice as effective on vampires as garlic cloves? Abby Cooper does.
Did you know werewolves are absolutely petrified of seeing a Hershey's kiss? Abby Cooper does.
The girls at Cypress Cove High school-especially Rich Witch Mia Hopwood-call Abby an uber-geek; the victims she rescues from zombies, werewolves and vampires just call her one thing: Hero!
But Abby and her fearless crew of movie ushers-slash-superheroes face more than just bloodsuckers and brain-biters. There's Wyatt Winters, for one; he's the hot new PR guru Ushers, Inc. has had to hire to handle all their press - and with his smoldering good looks and air of confidence, he's causing more than just tension between Abby and her old boy-crush-and fellow usher-Zach Nash.
And let's not forget the monsters, who aren't too happy about four geeky ushers beating their butts all over creation. Now the League of Associated Undead (LAD) is converging on Cypress Cove, determined to stop Ushers, Inc. once and for all.
When it's the monsters versus the monster hunters, who you gonna call?
Ushers, Inc., that's who!
According to the Living with the Living Dead Laws, you can't just toss suspected werewolves, vampires, mummies, or even zombies out on their ears just because you suspect they're on of the undead.
If he stared any harder, he'd sprain a retina or something.
Suddenly the recognizable smell of a pure werewolf - a little sulfur, a lot of cat food and plenty of wet, low-down dirty dog fur - fills the arena as the young guy with hair scrambles down the theater aisles and out to safety.
Oh my gosh! Rusty Fischer, you are a rock star!
Seriously, this man is a living definition of awesomeness. He did it again. He totally blew me away with his incredibly nerdy sense of humor, fantastically original plot line and un-freakin-believably cool characters. I laughed long and hard, in the most un-ladylike manner (yes, it involved a few really loud snorts, and yes, I am pretty sure I came dangerously close to swallowing my tongue. At least twice). Ushers, Inc. is exactly my kind of book: hilarious, fast-paced, intelligent, toothy! Reading it is a sweet, enjoyable and extremely mood-lifting experience, kind of like having a Friday get-together with a bunch of old friends to watch a B-class horror movie (six-pack of beer and pizza mandatory). It's just.. awesome. I loved it!
Seriously, this man is a living definition of awesomeness. He did it again. He totally blew me away with his incredibly nerdy sense of humor, fantastically original plot line and un-freakin-believably cool characters. I laughed long and hard, in the most un-ladylike manner (yes, it involved a few really loud snorts, and yes, I am pretty sure I came dangerously close to swallowing my tongue. At least twice). Ushers, Inc. is exactly my kind of book: hilarious, fast-paced, intelligent, toothy! Reading it is a sweet, enjoyable and extremely mood-lifting experience, kind of like having a Friday get-together with a bunch of old friends to watch a B-class horror movie (six-pack of beer and pizza mandatory). It's just.. awesome. I loved it!
It's always such a fine sensation; my cold, dead lips on his ruby red warm ones. Although they're quite dead, too - stupid lucky vampire lips!The novella kicks off with an elderly lady turning into a werewolf during a movie screening at the Flickers Theatre, where Abby works together with Zak, Cliff, and her best friend, Tracy. You'd expect people to run away in panic, but, no, not a chance. We're talking world where werewolves, vamps and all sorts of other undead/living dead things are roaming around openly. Sure, they're pain-in-the-you-know-what, but at least people don't pretend they don't exist anymore. And we have Ushers, Inc. to protect us! What are they? Well, that's kind of the whole point of this brilliantly written novella, so I can't just tell you... you're going to have to read it and find out for yourself! And trust me, you won't regret!
"Out of my way, loser, I'm trying to watch the movie."Wow, what a fun ride this book was! It's an entertaining, well-crafted, witty and disarmingly charming story that will put a huge grin on your face. If you're tired of all the overly-serious, profound, heavy reads and feel like something light, cute, and at the same time totally kick-ass and cool, well, look no further, this is a perfect book for you! Rusty Fischer effortlessly draws readers into this fantastically imaginative world. His characters are real and three-dimensional, easy to connect with and laugh-out-loud hilarious. They're all very unique and each of them brings something different to the story. Abby is a really awesome chick. Tough, intelligent, funny. She's the kind of girl I'd love to have as my best friend. The chemistry between Abby and Zach was pretty sweet and I had a lot of fun watching their relationship sprout and slowly grow. No instant-kind of love, but a thoughtful, believable attraction that develops with no rush over a long period of time.
I stand politely just out of swiping range and whisper, "Yes sir, so are the other patrons and well, frankly, we've had... complaints."
"From who?" he asks.
"From whom," I correct, because there's nothing a werewolf hates more than being corrected, let me tell you. well, aside from getting capped by a silver bullet, of course." And that's confidential, but if you don't take the growling, hissing, and fang licking down a notch, I'm going to have to ask you to leave."
Cliff is literally jumping up and down on the candy counter now, his massive man-boobs jiggling like some X-rated theater usher peep show that is sooooo not turning me on in the slightest.Filled with some seriously intense action, priceless advices how to "deal with" different kinds of Undead, and gloriously amusing punch-lines, Ushers, Inc. is a one-of-a-kind reading experience. It's a quick but delicious read, immensely satisfying and compelling. You'll devour it in less than two hours, but you'll remember it forever. I'm a huge fan of Rusty Fischer's work, his writing style is top notch, his stories are flavorful, unique and genuinely funny. He's a master storyteller who writes with extraordinary passion. His rich literary imagination makes him truly exceptional. I highly recommend this and his other books, you will love them!
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Thanks to the fabulous:
Rusty Fischer
I have one paperback AND eBook copy of Zombies Don't Cry up for grabs!
But that's not all!
I also have two eCopies of Ushers, Inc. to give away, too! :D How awesome is that!
The giveaway will be posted tomorrow, together with the fabulous Guest Post by Rusty Fischer!!!
Don't forget to stop by and enter!
TRUST ME, YOU WANT THESE BOOKS!!!
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This review is posted as a part of the MEN in YA event (Nov 20th - Dec 20th)
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About the AuthorEvie is the Blogger behind Bookish. She enjoys reading many different genres, especially YA, Paranormal, Contemporary Fiction and Fantasy.She loves talking to authors and is always happy to welcome them for interviews, and guest posts. She also likes spreading the love for awesome books and chatting with fellow book-worms.
You can find Evie here: Twitter | Facebook | Goodreads | Shelfari | The Library Thing
