Thursday, July 14, 2016

I'm Back!

As some of you may or may not have noticed, while Bookish Lifestyle has not been quiet, I have been virtually MIA since March. This is due to a variety of reason, but two main factors:

Blogger Burnout

The struggle is real guys. I got to a point where it all felt so overwhelming. Reading, reviewing, posting, updating, lather, rinse, repeat. I got to a point where I just couldn't take it any more. I felt alone and lost.

Why was I bothering? We're people even reading my posts? Was I making any bit of difference?

I know this sounds like an existential crisis and overly dramatic for something that is supposed to be a hobby, but that's exactly what it felt like. If you're a blogger and have been blogging for sometime, maybe this is something you can relate to. If you don't blog and you've ever been burnt out on a hobby, I know you can relate.

That feeling when your hobby turns into anything but a hobby. It turns into a chore. Something you have to do. Something your force yourself to do. Like cleaning. God, do I hate cleaning. But it needs to be done because while I don't enjoy cleaning, I also don't enjoy living in filth.

So I took a step back. I started reading for me, I stopped reviewing, I stopped writing posts, and I stopped putting effort into something I had once loved.


Many moons ago, back when I was a newbie and Bookish Lifestyle (then known solely as Bookish), Evie had a baby and disappeared. Babies change your life (no duh) and she just didn't have the time nor enjoy to devote to the blog.

Understandable and expected. What I didn't expect was to feel the same way when I got pregnant. That first trimester was murder. I wasn't eating and what I was eating I was throwing up. Not a pretty picture.

I didn't want to read, it was the furthermost thing from my mind. All I wanted was to lie on the couch and watch mind-numbing TV. And boy did I ever. My reading slowed down immensley and books I was excited to read (namely The Winners Kiss by Marie Rutkoski and A Court of Mist and Fury by Sarah J. Maas) sat on my kitchen table for weeks. This was a series ender and a sequel to by favorite book of 2015 and I just did. Not. Care.

It would take me weeks to read books and that was only when I practically forced myself. TV was just so much easier. I didn't have to think and I could just zone out and relax. Going to bed at 7:30/8:00 every night also did not help.

I kept telling myself that this is when I should be devouring books and taking care of that TBR pile. Once baby comes there will be so little time for reading that I'll long for the days when I could sit and read uninterrupted for hours.

I don't mean that in a "I long for the days when I didn't have a baby" way, but the "Remember when I had all that free time and squandered it on trashy reality TV?" way.


Which brings me to today. I'm father along in my pregnancy and things have calmed down. I'm back to my old energy level (almost), the nausea is gone, and I've read many books in the recent weeks.

I'm feeling . . . almost normal.

I woke up the in the middle of the night a few days ago and realized how much I missed blogging and Bookish Lifestyle. I missed interacting with our readers, creating posts, reviewing books and products, and realized it was time to come back.

Not only did my time away rejuvenate me, but it also gave me perspective. While I never felt like I had to review every book that I read, I made it more of an obligation. Even books I read for fun/for me I felt had to be reviewed. So I'm stepping away from that.

I'm going to continue reading books for me, but once I finish then decide if I should write a review or not (books I receive for review will be the exception). I was never the person to take notes while reading (with the exception of noting some fun quotes), so it terms of reading for review it won't change anything.

I feel like this mindset is going to make things so much easier and more relaxed. I'm giving myself more of an option and more freedom when it comes to blogging.

I can't say I'll be posting as much as I was a few months ago, but I can promise you'll hear from me more than you have been. I'm taking it one day at a time and we'll see what happens!

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